#186. The ordinary days we took for granted… (2024.11.25)

Thank you very much for opening my blog.

I’m Sakurazaka46’s 2nd generation member, Endo Hikari.

 

 

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The day when the ordinary days I took for granted was no longer so,
everything went dark before my eyes immediately after that.

 

During my hiatus, I desperately tried to bring back that normalcy,
and I realized that unless I changed my mindset of “It has to be like this”, then there would be no point in returning.

 

So maybe some things have changed since I came back.

 

But being able to think that “Sakurazaka46 is the place I will definitely return to” from the moment I decided to take hiatus,
I think that it was because I feel that I belong here, I want to return here, it is what supported me emotionally, and because there were people and songs that are important for me.

 

Although I think that it would be rude to all the fans who have been waiting and cheering for me, and who have continued to like me no matter what; and I also think that it’s not right for me to say something like that, so I am determined not to ever say it,

In the past two days, there were times when I wanted to apologize for my lack of strength in the past year,

 

 

Since my return at the anniversary live last year, it has been much harder and lonelier than when I was on hiatus, and there have been many things that are out of my control.

There were times when I couldn’t do the things that everyone has took for granted,
and there were days when I couldn’t stop blaming myself for not being able to do the same thing as everyone else, when I couldn’t stop asking myself why.

 

Although I am now able to give it my all in both mind and body, I also felt that there have been moments when I wasn’t able to convey that.

That’s why, I’m sorry that I couldn’t put it into a tangible form and convey it to you.

 

But by no means has the fire in my heart gone out. 
It’s burning brightly 🔥

 

Next year, I would like to create more for everyone opportunities to see me stand out even more!

 

Not just next year, but starting from BACKS LIVE!! in December. 

 

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But of course, there were also happy moments.

Such as how I was finally able to participate in 2nd generation’s gen song, “Konbinaato” 🟠 

I have been watching its performance, and I was happy to do it on the same stage as my genmates!

 

I’d be happy if we could continue to walk together in our 5th year as well
Please continue to give your support 😌♡ 

 

And, Buddies!!
Happy 4th birthday!! 🎂

 

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I really wanted to feel the same way, so I asked the costume staff if I could wear and take a picture with it, and so I had my picture taken ✨

 

 

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Thank you very much for opening my blog again today.

I’d be happy if you could read my next blog as well.

Well then~

 

#hikarinblog
#光莉ふぁむ (Hikari Fam)

Hikari 🦋